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Old 26-May-17, 23:35
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Maitsek Maitsek is offline
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Default Re: Why are we so ashamed?

I think shame is a deeply personal feeling, related to our specific life experiences even if the negative perception of fetishes in society can have an impact.

I spent a lot of time struggling with my mixed wrestling interests when i was younger, because i couldn't make a sense of those sensations and desires during my childhood and teenage years. As LicensetoKill said in a previous post, it is not easy to feel "out of place" and loneliness can be a heavy burden.
My lack of body self-acceptance was like a invisible injury i couldn't confront : i had skipped a grade and as i was small for my age with slow reflexes, a lot of girls in my class were two heads taller than me and could have easily hurt me if they have wanted to. My arousal with the prospect of being overpowered was then rooted in reality, with conflicting feelings.
Children can be quite mean with each other and i did have harassment issues. So early in life, i couldn't make a difference between a fetish and non consensual bullying, and i really thought i had a desire for being hurt and humiliated even if i felt bad. I was just confused, with no easy answer : shame was so obvious i wasn't even conscious of it.

Those experiences happened a long time ago but i must say it is still sometimes painful, because shame and anxiety aren't about logic. Emotions are there, like frozen in time and what is important is to try to be open with ourselves. Everybody has his own history with this fetish and there is no good or bad way to feel about it.

Last edited by Maitsek; 26-May-17 at 23:40.
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