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Old 20-Nov-17, 17:36
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Default 8 reasons why I hate my mom right now

1. She's too young.
It was a big scandal. She had me when she was 16 - a junior in high school. I never did know my father; she said he didn't matter. We lived with my grandparents until I was eight, then we moved out and it's just been the two of us ever since. She sells real estate and is very good at it.
Now I'm turning 18 today and she’s only 34. To make it worse: she takes really good care of her skin so she looks even younger than that. All my friends are blown away when they first see her, and a lot of times if we go somewhere people assume we're a couple. Mom thinks this is funny and encourages it by taking my arm or calling me sweetheart. I don't find it amusing AT ALL.

2. She's bigger than me.
I think I'm average size at 5'8" and 165 pounds. I haven’t grown in almost a year so I think this is as tall as I’m going to get. She's 5'10" and wears high heels a lot so sometimes I only come up to her chin. That SUCKS. Every one of my friends is a lot bigger than their mom, but not me. Plus, I don't know how much she weighs, but it's probably more than me. The really frustrating thing is that I work out all the time and don't seem to get any bigger. She only takes yoga classes but has upper arms that are as big as my calves. A lot of women have big jiggly arms but my mom’s arms are solid. They’re just big. So are her legs. Her hips and shoulders are wider than mine too. My genetic father must have been a shrimp!

3. She has really big boobs and a super curvy body.
Everywhere she goes she’s the center of attention because of her figure. I'm talking Christina Hendricks boobs, the kind that swell up into mounds of cleavage, not typical fat person boobs. I picked up one of her bras once and couldn’t believe how big the cups were. It’s embarrassing. Ever since I can remember any friend I brought home went through the same reaction when they first saw her - eyes bugging out, grabbing my arm and whispering, "Dude..." And to make it worse, she flaunts it. She wears low-cut tops and tight jeans. She seems to seek out any opportunity to bend over in front of people; me included. But despite that she refuses to have a boyfriend. She’s turned down millions of dates. When I asked her why she smiled and said she was saving herself for someone special.

4. She’s stronger than me.
How many 18-year-olds have a mom that's stronger than they are? It's humiliating as fuck. Whenever I start to lift something heavy she takes over, saying "It's all right honey, I'll get it. Don't hurt yourself." To make it worse, it's usually pretty easy for her, too. Last night she took a jar out of my hand I was struggling to open and popped it right open. She just takes it for granted that I'm nowhere near as strong as her even though I'm a grown man. And since I’m probably done growing that means she’ll always be stronger than me. That is so unfair!

5. She insists on hugging and kissing me all the time.
Even in public. But it's worse at home. Every night before bed she comes into my room to give me a kiss goodnight even though I told her that's no longer necessary. And she's always wearing some nightgown that only comes down to mid-thigh and has thin shoulder straps, so she's showing a lot of skin. Way too much skin. Plus, she doesn't wear a bra to bed so there is always a lot of jiggling and moving around underneath her gown. She sits on the side of my bed and gives me a long hug and kisses me right on the lips, even though I told her it makes me uncomfortable. I just have to sit there being squeezed by all this flesh. But it’s not just at night - last week I was walking by her when she was sitting on a kitchen chair and she said she needed a hug and pulled me onto her lap! I complained and tried to pry her arms loose but she just said "You're not too big to sit on your mommy's lap, are you?" She kept me there and hugged me playfully, laughing at my attempts to get loose.

6. She's too strict.
She won't let me have a girlfriend. She won't let me go out partying with my friends. She gave me a curfew. Those are just some of the rules. About a month ago I got really mad and told her I was an adult and her rules were ridiculous. Then she got mad right back and grabbed me, pulling me face down across her lap and holding me there. She had one hand on the back of my neck and the other hand on my butt and said if I kept it up she was going to spank me. Her 18-year-old son! I couldn't bear the humiliation so I immediately started apologizing, because I knew she could really hurt me if she wanted to. Ever since then I get real nervous when she gets angry about something.

7. I think she's purposefully trying to make me horny.
This is super-weird, right? But the way she dresses and acts around me is driving me crazy. It's like she's flirting with me! The other day she leaned over and her huge breast fell out of her top. Instead of just putting it back in she puts her hands on her hips and says "Will you look at that? Sometimes having such big breasts is a real pain." Then she just stood there wanting me to look at it. I turned my head away and she laughed. Then she tucked it back in and asked me if I'd ever seen womans breast before. I didn't answer and she came over and wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug, apologizing if she made me uncomfortable. Then she kept holding on. Unfortunately, the whole thing gave me a boner and I know she had to feel it because she was pressing up against it while hugging me. She didn't let me go for a long time.

8. She's getting weirder.
Last night there was a real big thunderstorm and she came into my room wearing one of those skimpy nighties saying “I know you don’t like thunder, honey, so I can stay with you for a while.” I told I haven’t been afraid of thunder since I was nine but she insisted on getting into bed with me. Arguing got me nowhere so I got as far over as I could but she pulled me into her and eventually I went to sleep in her arms. At one point in the middle of the night I woke up and her leg was pushed in between mine right up against my crotch and my face was resting right on her breast. I tried to roll away but even in her sleep she was stronger than me and I couldn’t move. I had to lay there and of course got a huge erection. In the morning when were in the kitchen fixing breakfast I couldn’t even look her in the eye but she was super cheerful.

“What’s the matter, honey? Didn’t you get a good night’s sleep?”

I muttered something and she took me by the arm and cupped my chin, forcing me to look at her.

Gently, she said, “Are you embarrassed because you got an erection?”

There it was - the elephant in the room. “Yes!” I blurted out.

She smiled. “Don’t be. It’s only natural that a healthy young man should get aroused when he’s lying in bed with a soft, warm woman.”

“You’re my mom!”

“And who better to know what’s good for you?” she said. She patted me on the cheek. “I have a late showing tonight so you’ll probably be in bed when I get home, but it’s your 18th birthday, and I wanted it to be special. When I get home I’ll come into your room and we can talk more.”

Nervous, I said “About what?”

She smiled mysteriously and said “You’ll see.”

Then she went off to work and now I’m waiting for her to get home. I’ve been pacing all day. All I can think of is that if she comes into my room tonight, climbs into bed with me, takes off her nightgown and gets on top of me with her big naked body, could I stop her from fucking me?
I don’t think so.

That right there should be reason number 9, if you ask me.
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