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  #1  
Old 10-Sep-17, 14:03
Aygrol1 Aygrol1 is offline
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Default Getting past the idea of this fetish

I really enjoy watching all the great videos you guys post on here, I have been for around a year and a half. I'm not bashing this kink at all, I love it but i get quite embarrassed that I have it. I'm still in Highschool so I have gotten any experience with anything yet but opening up to someone about it is tough.

I was talking to some girl in India about it and she told me it was one of the strangest fetishes she's ever heard of. How do you guys explain it to others? I would imagine it would make a relationship really awkward:/
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  #2  
Old 10-Sep-17, 18:12
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LicensetoKill LicensetoKill is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

It can make a relationship awkward. Where a person grows up and what they're exposed to is important. I didn't grow up in India but I would think there's a lot less fetish there and it's much less accepted. There's also some variation between more conservative vs more sexually open parts of America.

People who are into fetish are often into it by HS but it's probably much more common with guys than girls. My first relationship (college, not HS), my GF found my fetish very uncomfortable. Different ladies react differently All you can do is run it by them and see what they say and perhaps figure out smooth ways to bring it up.

But no matter how you bring it up, I think 80% of women won't be interested, unless you look like Brad Pitt, then maybe only 60% won't be interested.
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  #3  
Old 10-Sep-17, 21:17
poochie22 poochie22 is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

Quote:
Originally Posted by LicensetoKill [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
But no matter how you bring it up, I think 80% of women won't be interested, unless you look like Brad Pitt, then maybe only 60% won't be interested.
So utterly not true. If you present it in the right light with the right timing, you should bat close to 100% as many of the people on this forum do. If you are socially awkward and not good at talking to people there is no doubt it will be much more difficult. Whether you look like Brad Pitt or not will have virtually nothing to do with it.
Interpersonal skills, confidence, patience will get you what you want in this fetish.

I would however file your Indian friends opinion under "not relevant" as she hails from a culture which so utterly different in respect to sex and gender roles that she may as well be from an alien world.

In reality, western females I have found to be very hip to it in most circumstances. It is widely considered among those in the fetish community to be one of the more vanilla and well accepted fetishes in fact.

Take some time to search this forum and you will find discussions that support what I am saying and give you a more complete perspective of how our fetish is viewed.
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  #4  
Old 10-Sep-17, 22:23
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schatten_PhD schatten_PhD is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

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Originally Posted by furrygrappler the second [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
Your Indian friend needs to get out more.
agreed. Also, it's worth pointing out that ideas of sexuality and gender are WAY more traditional than in the U.S. and Europe. It's not surprising she would say that.

Added after 5 minutes:

Quote:
Originally Posted by poochie22 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
So utterly not true. If you present it in the right light with the right timing, you should bat close to 100% as many of the people on this forum do. If you are socially awkward and not good at talking to people there is no doubt it will be much more difficult. Whether you look like Brad Pitt or not will have virtually nothing to do with it.
Interpersonal skills, confidence, patience will get you what you want in this fetish.

I would however file your Indian friends opinion under "not relevant" as she hails from a culture which so utterly different in respect to sex and gender roles that she may as well be from an alien world.

In reality, western females I have found to be very hip to it in most circumstances. It is widely considered among those in the fetish community to be one of the more vanilla and well accepted fetishes in fact.

Take some time to search this forum and you will find discussions that support what I am saying and give you a more complete perspective of how our fetish is viewed.
I think the truth is somewhere in the middle. You and licensetokill may very well be different ages. When you grew up, and where you live, have a big impact on your perceptions. There are plenty of women who are weirded out by our fetish, but it's also a matter of how you bring it up to them. If you come right out and say, on a first or third date, "would you beat me up?", that won't work. If you make it clear, once you have been intimate with them a bunch of times, that you like things a bit rough and playful, or that you like her on top sometimes, that has a higher probability of working.

Last edited by schatten_PhD; 10-Sep-17 at 22:23.
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  #5  
Old 10-Sep-17, 22:39
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LicensetoKill LicensetoKill is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

Quote:
Originally Posted by poochie22 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
So utterly not true. If you present it in the right light with the right timing, you should bat close to 100% as many of the people on this forum do. If you are socially awkward and not good at talking to people there is no doubt it will be much more difficult. Whether you look like Brad Pitt or not will have virtually nothing to do with it.
Interpersonal skills, confidence, patience will get you what you want in this fetish.

I would however file your Indian friends opinion under "not relevant" as she hails from a culture which so utterly different in respect to sex and gender roles that she may as well be from an alien world.

In reality, western females I have found to be very hip to it in most circumstances. It is widely considered among those in the fetish community to be one of the more vanilla and well accepted fetishes in fact.

Take some time to search this forum and you will find discussions that support what I am saying and give you a more complete perspective of how our fetish is viewed.
I did say when you get smoother the percentage drops, so lets not go with the utterly untrue. Especially when ladies are younger (HS age) it will seem weird to them. As women grow older, and as they've seen more, they're more open.

Depends a lot on how interested they are in the guy too and how he asks.
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Old 11-Sep-17, 05:29
slycordinator slycordinator is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

Quote:
Originally Posted by LicensetoKill [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
I didn't grow up in India but I would think there's a lot less fetish there and it's much less accepted.
That's not the case. They would just have different kinks. I'm into data science, so a story looking at the data available by country on searches to pornhub and Google porn related stuff seemed interesting.

And in one example, it showed that in the US, approximately 90% of searches for "how to breastfeed (x)" were related to how to breastfeed a baby and roughly 10% for how to do it for a man. In India, the split was roughly 50/50, indicating that that kink is far more common there than in the US, for whatever reason.

Not judging Indians btw.
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  #7  
Old 11-Sep-17, 20:11
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LicensetoKill LicensetoKill is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

Quote:
Originally Posted by slycordinator [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
That's not the case. They would just have different kinks. I'm into data science, so a story looking at the data available by country on searches to pornhub and Google porn related stuff seemed interesting.

And in one example, it showed that in the US, approximately 90% of searches for "how to breastfeed (x)" were related to how to breastfeed a baby and roughly 10% for how to do it for a man. In India, the split was roughly 50/50, indicating that that kink is far more common there than in the US, for whatever reason.

Not judging Indians btw.
You may be right, and I said what I said rather briefly. What I believe is that women are raised more conservative in India than in the US. Not as conservative as in Muslim countries. But they aren't exposed to as much. Men - that's a different story.
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Old 10-Sep-17, 18:47
furrygrappler the second furrygrappler the second is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

Quote:
Originally Posted by Aygrol1 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
I really enjoy watching all the great videos you guys post on here, I have been for around a year and a half. I'm not bashing this kink at all, I love it but i get quite embarrassed that I have it. I'm still in Highschool so I have gotten any experience with anything yet but opening up to someone about it is tough.

I was talking to some girl in India about it and she told me it was one of the strangest fetishes she's ever heard of. How do you guys explain it to others? I would imagine it would make a relationship really awkward:/
Your Indian friend needs to get out more.
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Old 10-Sep-17, 19:10
psf366 psf366 is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

I think LicesnsetoKill summed it up quite well. Guys like us have a tough road to travel -- most women aren't into what we're into. The truth is, our fetish will probably never be a popular choice. And unfortunately, most people -- especially young people -- prefer what is popular. But "unpopular" is not the same as "weird" or "sick." It just means you have to work harder to find what you want. My only advice is, do your best not to lie about your real feelings. Because if women believe your lies, you'll be stuck living a life that doesn't make you happy.
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Old 10-Sep-17, 20:44
brooksie brooksie is offline
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Default Re: Getting past the idea of this fetish

Quote:
Originally Posted by psf366 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
I think LicesnsetoKill summed it up quite well. Guys like us have a tough road to travel -- most women aren't into what we're into. The truth is, our fetish will probably never be a popular choice. And unfortunately, most people -- especially young people -- prefer what is popular. But "unpopular" is not the same as "weird" or "sick." It just means you have to work harder to find what you want. My only advice is, do your best not to lie about your real feelings. Because if women believe your lies, you'll be stuck living a life that doesn't make you happy.
There is an alternative, which is to compartmentalize your fetish. Simply put, that means pursuing a normal relationship and finding other outlets for your fetish. That's not for everyone, as it entails keeping secrets but it's one way around the problem.

I've always thought the ideal approach would be to be completely open about the fetish but I grew up in an era where that would have created a lot of social problems. Times have changed and many younger people seem to feel comfortable not hiding it. I have no idea how that works in their daily lives but you might ask those who are "out" how that works out for them. The most visibly identifiable of those who have this fetish are probably the content producers, who have websites with their name and picture. That's about as "out" as you can be. They would have a perspective on this that I couldn't even begin to imagine.
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