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Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
Those who have read my posts know that I have been looking for a great non session match with a female acquaintance, female friend or running partner etc. I just haven't been that successful.
I also have been taking an interest in martial arts. I tried judo, muay thay and went to my second jujitsu school earlier this week. Kind of doing the old "dojo tour" Well, this week at jujitsu, we did live rolling and lo and behold, I ended up with an attractive purple belt as a rolling partner. Yatzee! right? Well, not so much. It was very clinical and hard to get turned on around a crowd. My mind never went to any erotic feelings, it was all in the context of the class and technique. Like I said, clinical. What I found interesting was I never really knew what level of intensity I should go. I figured, she is a purple belt AND was helping to teach the class. So, I can go about 80 percent or so. I ended up on top the shole time and avoided her guard and anything she tried. It all prompted her to say "You sure you've never done this before?" "Your pass is legit, very quick" I could tell she was struggling with me. . . .or, was she just letting me have my way and taking it easy on me! Who knows? But the "How hard should I go?" question to myself was sort of baffling. I just wish it all took place gee-less and in my spare room! Ha |
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#2
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
Don't go to a dojo to get turned on. Let's assume she beat you and you got a boner? Would you really want that in class?
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#3
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
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And, yes, don't be obvious. If she says anything, just apologize, or say it's a reflex action and you can't help it. Ladies have complained about guys having boners in class, so it's not a good idea if it can be helped, but it also happens from time to time. |
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
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As for the class not being private, well, that can't be helped, unless she offers private training sessions, but even then, getting turned on might be seen as questionable. |
#5
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
I've been thinking about taking jiujitsu, but I wonder, do guys wear groincups for that? You'd think it would be recommended with all that "intimate" contact. Or would it be weirder if you wore a cup?
I remember when I was taking TKD as a teenager, I had a lot of reflexive boners, and sometimes had them in class during stretches. Having a cup on didn't necessarily help, but in BJJ I imagine it might reduce some of that "intimacy" factor. It's encouraging to hear your description of the roll as "clinical" because I frankly would feel like a major creep if I got a boner rolling with a lady. |
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
Well, that seems perfectly normal tbh. I don't think it'd be fair on the woman if you did get aroused - she's not here for any sexual reasons, I assume, so better for everyone that you stayed focused and in control.
Also maybe the fact that you handled her means it was a bad dojo? Genuinely, there's an awful lot of chancers out there. |
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
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#9
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
Sorry to say this, but if she had a purple belt and you are a noob, you must be one hell of an athlete, or massively bigger than her. That, or her belt and probably the whole dojo are really bullshit. A quick calculation is usually *one belt level per 20 lbs., as well as one level per 10 years of age difference. A purple belt is just a level less than brown and that's a pretty high ranking in BJJ. It regularly takes about 15 years of practice to get a black belt in this sport. I often roll with women in my BJJ class and have to say that it's fun, but under the circumstances; an audience, etc., it would be pretty difficult for me to get so turned on that I get a stiffy. I can see a situation where that might happen, but in a more private setting. If you stick with it, never know, you just might find yourself in that position. Good luck!
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#10
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Re: Rolled with an attractive lady in jujitsu - meh
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Looking back at it, if she had choked me (the guy in there for the first day) or instantly gotten me in an arm bar, what good would that do anyone in this situation. So, I guess she just let me brutishly wrestle her and gas myself while she used the time to play chess and tutor the noob. Looking back at it more, I think I offered an appropriate amount of resistance in this situation. I think it was a positive, but not for reasons usually talked about on the site. Like I said, clinical. |
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