Go Back   Male vs Female | The Mixed Wrestling Forum > Mixed Wrestling & Fighting > Wrestling & Fighting Discussion

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 21-Jan-21, 18:26
imindaforum imindaforum is offline
Junior Member
Points: 3,243, Level: 23 Points: 3,243, Level: 23 Points: 3,243, Level: 23
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 9
Thanks: 4
Thanked 6 Times in 3 Posts
Default Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Good day! Happily, I have myself a partner who is willing to try wrestling with me. We’re in our mid 20’s, and neither of us has any wrestling or session experience. What should I teach her, what should I keep in mind safety-wise? Thank you!
Reply With Quote
The Following 4 Users Say Thank You to imindaforum For This Useful Post:
  #2  
Old 21-Jan-21, 19:18
Mattgreg Mattgreg is offline
Junior Member
Points: 5,355, Level: 31 Points: 5,355, Level: 31 Points: 5,355, Level: 31
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Dec 2014
Posts: 4
Thanks: 773
Thanked 2 Times in 2 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

I think maybe a headscissor or bodyscissor pics would be awesome if you can
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 21-Jan-21, 20:23
Gatsby87 Gatsby87 is offline
Member
Points: 1,407, Level: 15 Points: 1,407, Level: 15 Points: 1,407, Level: 15
Activity: 27.8% Activity: 27.8% Activity: 27.8%
 
Join Date: Nov 2019
Posts: 135
Thanks: 190
Thanked 262 Times in 89 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Congrats on having a partner who is willing to indulge in some grappling with you! While I’m no expert, I have experience with this between partners, session wrestlers and experience in my local BDSM and kink community. To start, you’ll want to treat this just like you would with any kind of BDSM activity, and that is establish consent before play. Sit down with your partner when you’re not hot and horny and have a thorough discussion on kinks, soft limits and hard limits. Things to talk about include, but aren’t limited to:
  • How intense do you want your sessions to be? Do you want to go more of the fantasy route, or do you want to be more competitive?
  • What kind of holds are allowed? Joint locks, chokes, smothers are all things that need to be covered. She might not have an issue with getting armbarred, but may not want to be choked.
  • Speaking of that, does she want pin, submission, a sexfight, or some combination of either?
  • What kind of attire do you and her want? Want workout clothing, will she feel comfortable going topless, or fighting nude?
  • Where does she want to fight? Do you have a matted area, or do you want to fight in the backyard, or the bedroom?
  • Is trash talking ok? I had a partner who loved it when I called her derogatory names during a match, and another who did not.
  • Is striking allowed? What areas of the body are ok with you and her to hit?
  • Are KO’s ok? What about ignoring taps?
  • Are leaving marks like scratches and bruises on the body ok? If so, where are bruises ok to have? (She might be ok with bruises in an area that can be easily covered like breasts or stomach vs the face, neck or forearms)
  • And finally, aftercare is important. What does she need after a match? What do you need?

Basically, you want to cover everything with her in as much detail as you can to make sure that you both have the most pleasurable experience possible. The last thing you want is to do something that makes her upsets and ruins the experience for you (and vice versa!) This kink is so broad and has so many different aspects and niches to it that you’ll be hard pressed to find two mixed wrestling fans with the exact same interests and limits.

Now, to get more specifically into wrestling itself, your absolute best bet is to look into taking grappling classes. With COVID, how feasible this is might vary based on where you live, but in general, going to a martial arts gym is a great place to learn proper technique including how to properly break a fall, choke without causing serious and/or permanent damage, and when to tap safely to a hold. There are even BDSM classes (again, depends on your area) devoted to wrestling, or what is more commonly referred to in that world as “rough body play” or “primal” play that can teach you proper and safe grappling and striking techniques.

Another suggestion I have is for you and your partner to actually see a session wrestler! In the BDSM world, it is not uncommon for partners to see a dominatrix to learn more about the trade, and just like in any thing that we do in our lives, sometimes the best way to learn is to see a professional. Find someone who has been around for awhile, has skill and experience (in other words isn’t someone who only relies on brute strength and actually knows technique) and has worked with couples before. You may be surprised to hear session providers who have experience with working with couples.

And finally, a couple important points to keep note of. If you’re going to incorporate choke holds in your matches, please learn and practice how to properly perform blood chokes. Blood chokes target the carotid artery and jugular vein by putting pressure on the sides of the neck, and when performed properly cause your opponent to go out in seconds. Air chokes involve compression in the front of the neck and should NEVER be performed as they can crush and do permanent damage to the sensitive organs in the neck. If you’re going to incorporate striking, focus your blows on large, fleshy parts of the body with lots of muscle. Areas like the glutes, upper arms, thighs are usually good. Stomach is a bit of a “yellow” zone: if you’re doing body punches make sure you and your partner know how to tense your abs to prepare for the blow and exhale out, and avoid the ribs. Also, unless you and your partner are absolutely, 100% ok with it, don’t follow through on your punches (in other words, keep them light and stingy versus putting all your weight into your punch).

There’s so much more that goes into this than I can cover in one post, but I hope this helps! Like I said, I’m no expert, but I have been doing this for a bit.

Good luck!
Reply With Quote
The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Gatsby87 For This Useful Post:
  #4  
Old 21-Jan-21, 20:47
imindaforum imindaforum is offline
Junior Member
Points: 3,243, Level: 23 Points: 3,243, Level: 23 Points: 3,243, Level: 23
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 9
Thanks: 4
Thanked 6 Times in 3 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Quote:
Originally Posted by Gatsby87 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
Congrats on having a partner who is willing to indulge in some grappling with you! While I’m no expert, I have experience with this between partners, session wrestlers and experience in my local BDSM and kink community. To start, you’ll want to treat this just like you would with any kind of BDSM activity, and that is establish consent before play. Sit down with your partner when you’re not hot and horny and have a thorough discussion on kinks, soft limits and hard limits. Things to talk about include, but aren’t limited to:
  • How intense do you want your sessions to be? Do you want to go more of the fantasy route, or do you want to be more competitive?
  • What kind of holds are allowed? Joint locks, chokes, smothers are all things that need to be covered. She might not have an issue with getting armbarred, but may not want to be choked.
  • Speaking of that, does she want pin, submission, a sexfight, or some combination of either?
  • What kind of attire do you and her want? Want workout clothing, will she feel comfortable going topless, or fighting nude?
  • Where does she want to fight? Do you have a matted area, or do you want to fight in the backyard, or the bedroom?
  • Is trash talking ok? I had a partner who loved it when I called her derogatory names during a match, and another who did not.
  • Is striking allowed? What areas of the body are ok with you and her to hit?
  • Are KO’s ok? What about ignoring taps?
  • Are leaving marks like scratches and bruises on the body ok? If so, where are bruises ok to have? (She might be ok with bruises in an area that can be easily covered like breasts or stomach vs the face, neck or forearms)
  • And finally, aftercare is important. What does she need after a match? What do you need?

Basically, you want to cover everything with her in as much detail as you can to make sure that you both have the most pleasurable experience possible. The last thing you want is to do something that makes her upsets and ruins the experience for you (and vice versa!) This kink is so broad and has so many different aspects and niches to it that you’ll be hard pressed to find two mixed wrestling fans with the exact same interests and limits.

Now, to get more specifically into wrestling itself, your absolute best bet is to look into taking grappling classes. With COVID, how feasible this is might vary based on where you live, but in general, going to a martial arts gym is a great place to learn proper technique including how to properly break a fall, choke without causing serious and/or permanent damage, and when to tap safely to a hold. There are even BDSM classes (again, depends on your area) devoted to wrestling, or what is more commonly referred to in that world as “rough body play” or “primal” play that can teach you proper and safe grappling and striking techniques.

Another suggestion I have is for you and your partner to actually see a session wrestler! In the BDSM world, it is not uncommon for partners to see a dominatrix to learn more about the trade, and just like in any thing that we do in our lives, sometimes the best way to learn is to see a professional. Find someone who has been around for awhile, has skill and experience (in other words isn’t someone who only relies on brute strength and actually knows technique) and has worked with couples before. You may be surprised to hear session providers who have experience with working with couples.

And finally, a couple important points to keep note of. If you’re going to incorporate choke holds in your matches, please learn and practice how to properly perform blood chokes. Blood chokes target the carotid artery and jugular vein by putting pressure on the sides of the neck, and when performed properly cause your opponent to go out in seconds. Air chokes involve compression in the front of the neck and should NEVER be performed as they can crush and do permanent damage to the sensitive organs in the neck. If you’re going to incorporate striking, focus your blows on large, fleshy parts of the body with lots of muscle. Areas like the glutes, upper arms, thighs are usually good. Stomach is a bit of a “yellow” zone: if you’re doing body punches make sure you and your partner know how to tense your abs to prepare for the blow and exhale out, and avoid the ribs. Also, unless you and your partner are absolutely, 100% ok with it, don’t follow through on your punches (in other words, keep them light and stingy versus putting all your weight into your punch).

There’s so much more that goes into this than I can cover in one post, but I hope this helps! Like I said, I’m no expert, but I have been doing this for a bit.

Good luck!
Thank you for a very useful and very thoughtful response, we’ll keep all of that in mind!

To clarify on your last point - as I said, we have no grappling experience at all, does the choke hold warning apply to headscissors as well, or only RNC / triangle? Should we not try headscissors until we’ve had some training?
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 21-Jan-21, 20:54
ca12345 ca12345 is offline
Member
Points: 2,689, Level: 21 Points: 2,689, Level: 21 Points: 2,689, Level: 21
Activity: 3.7% Activity: 3.7% Activity: 3.7%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Aug 2016
Posts: 238
Thanks: 29
Thanked 183 Times in 111 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Just my personal opinion, I’d go into the first match trying to keep things fun and depending on her personality, let it evolve from there. If she gets into the competition side of it, you could take a class together or do research on the internet. But if she just wanted a playful match with no competition or seriousness, a lot of planning might be too much too soon.

I’ve wrestled some girls who got into it and liked being able to win but others just liked to keep it playful and either weren’t competitive or wanted to be more submissive. It’s pretty easy to have fun with it regardless of what their personality or desired style is.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to ca12345 For This Useful Post:
  #6  
Old 22-Jan-21, 03:17
imindaforum imindaforum is offline
Junior Member
Points: 3,243, Level: 23 Points: 3,243, Level: 23 Points: 3,243, Level: 23
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 9
Thanks: 4
Thanked 6 Times in 3 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Quote:
Originally Posted by ca12345 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
Just my personal opinion, I’d go into the first match trying to keep things fun and depending on her personality, let it evolve from there. If she gets into the competition side of it, you could take a class together or do research on the internet. But if she just wanted a playful match with no competition or seriousness, a lot of planning might be too much too soon.

I’ve wrestled some girls who got into it and liked being able to win but others just liked to keep it playful and either weren’t competitive or wanted to be more submissive. It’s pretty easy to have fun with it regardless of what their personality or desired style is.
True, yeah - that would be the best mindset. I'd still like to know about the chokehold thing for, you know, health and safety reasons, considering that we're both untrained.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 22-Jan-21, 11:11
rhett54 rhett54 is offline
Senior Member
Points: 5,601, Level: 31 Points: 5,601, Level: 31 Points: 5,601, Level: 31
Activity: 0% Activity: 0% Activity: 0%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 123
Thanks: 1,075
Thanked 393 Times in 80 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Obviously I don't know how much enthusiasm your partner is expressing as you approach your first match, but I know that when I was in your position too much attention to planning and detail would have probably overwhelmed my partner and caused her to take a step back. Since we had no experience (but I knew more than she did because of my fetish) our first session was simply to teach her a few holds so she could see if she liked it. We stuck with very straightforward holds - front, rear, and figure 4 head scissors, side body scissors, full nelson with body scissors, grapevine, that sort of thing. After a brief description of each hold I allowed her to apply the hold to me, and then we would see if I could escape (and of course I couldn't ). One by one I tapped to each hold - not because of pain, but when it became clear that she had the hold locked in and she could keep me in it about as long as she wanted to. Actually we were both kind of amazed at how easy it was for her to maintain a hold once it was applied. While this was certainly mild by some standards, I was intensely turned on because it was the first time I had ever been placed in some of the holds I had fantasized about for years. And then, of course, we had awesome sex after the wrestling! Afterward we talked and I asked how she liked putting me in those holds. That was when she said the words I longed to hear - "It was fun!"

Last edited by rhett54; 22-Jan-21 at 12:03.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to rhett54 For This Useful Post:
  #8  
Old 22-Jan-21, 11:22
Arnie Arnie is offline
Member
Points: 1,205, Level: 13 Points: 1,205, Level: 13 Points: 1,205, Level: 13
Activity: 7.4% Activity: 7.4% Activity: 7.4%
 
Join Date: Apr 2019
Posts: 115
Thanks: 48
Thanked 90 Times in 63 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

I'd try armwrestling first. Don't crush her in that. Make sure it is close and fun. You want to give her some confidence. After that say something like, wow if your arms are that strong you legs are probably stronget than mine. From there let her start with you pinned sobshe knows what it feels like to look down at you. Hopefullyvshe enjoys the view and will want to be on top all the time. Maybe let her put you in a body scissors and show her how to flex her hips and glutes into it.

Have fun!
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to Arnie For This Useful Post:
  #9  
Old 22-Jan-21, 11:38
ssddfaudhey ssddfaudhey is offline
Member
Points: 7,750, Level: 37 Points: 7,750, Level: 37 Points: 7,750, Level: 37
Activity: 29.6% Activity: 29.6% Activity: 29.6%
Last Achievements
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 552
Thanks: 740
Thanked 519 Times in 286 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

Start with bodyscissor from different angles.See if you can escape and if she can squeeze you into submission.Headscissors same thing.Teach her the grapevine pin and school girl pin.
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to ssddfaudhey For This Useful Post:
  #10  
Old 22-Jan-21, 15:02
jacklio jacklio is offline
Member
Points: 1,648, Level: 16 Points: 1,648, Level: 16 Points: 1,648, Level: 16
Activity: 5.6% Activity: 5.6% Activity: 5.6%
 
Join Date: Aug 2018
Posts: 81
Thanks: 6
Thanked 34 Times in 20 Posts
Default Re: Wrestling with partner - first time for both of us

u guys could watch some videos toghether and figure out what kind of intensity you want but just starting playful would be my advice

anyway congretulation but how did u manage to make her want to wrestle? i am curious
Reply With Quote
The Following User Says Thank You to jacklio For This Useful Post:
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
What happened to Mutiny's wrestling partner Brooke? sarge0068 Wrestling & Fighting Discussion 1 14-Dec-20 13:28
Wrestling Partner?? GeoffM Wrestling & Fighting Discussion 10 15-Oct-19 20:42
How to find female wrestling partner real life? wrestler73 Wrestling & Fighting Discussion 19 17-Mar-18 18:58
Female Wrestling partner needed please :) Jamesessex Wrestling & Fighting Discussion 0 25-Jan-13 18:21


All times are GMT. The time now is 05:06.


Powered by vBulletin® - Copyright ©2000 - 2021, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.