Should you give 2nd chances with bad (misunderstood?) sessions?

[uxiel]

That was quick. I hope you're on the same page this time.

[KazanaVest12]

Originally Posted by FetishWebDev [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

I'm seeing her again tomorrow. For better or worse I'll report what happens!

So...how'd it go?

[FetishWebDev]

Originally Posted by KazanaVest12 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

So...how'd it go?

So I don't have a lot to say because the session was neither outstanding nor was it terrible.

It was a *huge* improvement over the first session in the sense that I got what I wanted, physically speaking. I don't think I will session with her again, but I don't feel ripped off this time.

I made sure to tell her what I wanted at the start of the session this time. Like before, she seemed to have totally forgotten what I had repeatedly said between the first and 2nd session via WhatsApp. It's hard for me to understand and still kind of frustrating, but I'll just need to accept it. Many of you have described similar experiences.

On my end though, I chickened out of a lot of what I asked for. I thought I would want a continual beatdown, but I found myself using the safe word after just a handful of her blows. She was able to adjust on the fly though, and had a good sense of what I wanted. This was really nice.

I dreamed of being choked out by her, but I just wasn't feeling it that night. Part of my fear was her technique - she seemed to crank holds on when we wrestled, and you shouldn't have to crank on a hold to choke someone out. So I changed my mind about KOs.

The session took place in her apartment which was kind of a turn off. She's a single mother, and she's obviously quite poor. She doesn't even own a computer. The apartment was a complete mess. On the way over, I asked how her day had gone and she went on a 20 minute rant about a shitty client of hers. It was offputting to see her out of control emotionally like that. I found it hard not to feel sorry for her. And so there was no way I could feel truly dominated by someone who was so out of control with her own life.

So yeah...not bad, but not great.

A "great" session is a complicated thing. It's beyond just getting physically dominated; it's when you click well with the girl too. We come from very different backgrounds, so it's not surprising that this emotional connection just isn't there that I feel with other session girls.

Anyway, I appreciate all the feedback you guys have posted. Lots of lessons learned from this experience, and from the experiences you have all posted.

Also...REALLY think twice about traveling to see a girl. I traveled for both of these sessions and seriously underestimated the full cost of the trips. It's not just the air fare - it's the Ubers, the eating out. Both trips added up to way more than I thought they were going to cost. This won't hurt me too badly financially, but it still stings that I blew nearly 3k for two sessions (once you take the travel into account) that were mediocre at best when I could have gotten three or four two-hour sessions with girls in town who I already knew were good.

[boyofwinter]

Originally Posted by FetishWebDev [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

Also...REALLY think twice about traveling to see a girl.

I think the question most of us have after reading this is, why then? What about her was so compelling for you that you undertook this? I think my priors are fairly well known around here, ie quite a few other posters could probably 'holodeck' a lady likely to coax me to do what you just did. So what was it for you and did you at least get that much from the sessions?

[bizyz]

Alot of the session women who complain about clients have good reason to do so but some of these gals are real space cadets.

[KillerCrushes]

Originally Posted by FetishWebDev [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

So I don't have a lot to say because the session was neither outstanding nor was it terrible.

It was a *huge* improvement over the first session in the sense that I got what I wanted, physically speaking. I don't think I will session with her again, but I don't feel ripped off this time.

I made sure to tell her what I wanted at the start of the session this time. Like before, she seemed to have totally forgotten what I had repeatedly said between the first and 2nd session via WhatsApp. It's hard for me to understand and still kind of frustrating, but I'll just need to accept it. Many of you have described similar experiences.

On my end though, I chickened out of a lot of what I asked for. I thought I would want a continual beatdown, but I found myself using the safe word after just a handful of her blows. She was able to adjust on the fly though, and had a good sense of what I wanted. This was really nice.

I dreamed of being choked out by her, but I just wasn't feeling it that night. Part of my fear was her technique - she seemed to crank holds on when we wrestled, and you shouldn't have to crank on a hold to choke someone out. So I changed my mind about KOs.

The session took place in her apartment which was kind of a turn off. She's a single mother, and she's obviously quite poor. She doesn't even own a computer. The apartment was a complete mess. On the way over, I asked how her day had gone and she went on a 20 minute rant about a shitty client of hers. It was offputting to see her out of control emotionally like that. I found it hard not to feel sorry for her. And so there was no way I could feel truly dominated by someone who was so out of control with her own life.

So yeah...not bad, but not great.

A "great" session is a complicated thing. It's beyond just getting physically dominated; it's when you click well with the girl too. We come from very different backgrounds, so it's not surprising that this emotional connection just isn't there that I feel with other session girls.

Anyway, I appreciate all the feedback you guys have posted. Lots of lessons learned from this experience, and from the experiences you have all posted.

Also...REALLY think twice about traveling to see a girl. I traveled for both of these sessions and seriously underestimated the full cost of the trips. It's not just the air fare - it's the Ubers, the eating out. Both trips added up to way more than I thought they were going to cost. This won't hurt me too badly financially, but it still stings that I blew nearly 3k for two sessions (once you take the travel into account) that were mediocre at best when I could have gotten three or four two-hour sessions with girls in town who I already knew were good.

There's a part of me that thinks you went back to see her and then shared this recap, because you want compatriots to brutalize you with "what in the actual fuck?!"-type responses.

So, if that's the case, what in the actual fuck? I'm not saying that a woman in a hard situation doesn't have the right to grind to make ends meet, and I'm certainly not saying that she should be relegated to working with clients who have less means/flexibility than you - as I see things, as long as you can afford her, then you're in her market. But from a client's perspective, what is the draw? Sometimes, one can attracted to a woman solely from a photo set and that's totally fine. But what is it about this one that hooked you? Was it the fact that everything is on the menu?

If this is not what you wanted, just ignore this post. lol

[uxiel]

Originally Posted by FetishWebDev [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

The session took place in her apartment which was kind of a turn off. She's a single mother, and she's obviously quite poor. She doesn't even own a computer. The apartment was a complete mess. On the way over, I asked how her day had gone and she went on a 20 minute rant about a shitty client of hers. It was offputting to see her out of control emotionally like that. I found it hard not to feel sorry for her. And so there was no way I could feel truly dominated by someone who was so out of control with her own life.

Yeah, once you sense it's this kind of girl, it's pretty obvious she's not going to have it together enough to be very organized. You could make this trip 10 times and she's still unlikely to give you the "perfect" session even once. I think it's generally better to stick to a few session girls you really connect with and who give a great experience.

I sessioned with a girl in her apartment once, it was also obvious she was a single mom, she wasn't extremely poor, but it was still a little weird for me going to use the bathroom through her kid's room. Definitely was a very expensive session with all the travel costs included. Flights + rental car + gas + hotel + eating out + session fee. I now don't bother going unless it's at least in driving distance, or if I'm traveling there anyway.

I talked to a girl after I sessioned with her about life, and it was obvious she went through a lot of BS with the guys she sees. Getting no-showed, having idiot college students pretending to be a producer to get a shorter, cheaper session (then "oh lol I don't have a camera, just film it with your phone and send it to me later, but I won't give you a good mechanism to send the file over"), etc. Then you see some of them basically starving themselves for photo shoots, and you see the physical and mental toll it takes on them. Or seeing them spend their entire life (at least while touring) constantly tapping away on their phones, trying to filter through all the BS on email, twitter, instagram, whatever other apps, and find the few clients who are actually going to show up, be respectful, and be a paying client. I am not sure if this is representative of the average session girl, but it did strike me. Not a very fun life I imagine. But many people have it worse of course. I hope the girl I'm talking about can at least relax and live comfortably when she is at home.

[FetishWebDev]

Originally Posted by boyofwinter [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

What about her was so compelling for you that you undertook this...So what was it for you and did you at least get that much from the sessions?

I was looking for someone new to session with and noticed many of her reviews going on and on about her KOs.

She was my type, physically speaking.

I got in touch and she responded almost immediately. You all know how rare that is!

We quickly moved to WhatsApp and I told her more about what I wanted beyond wrestling. I wanted someone to bully me, humiliate me about certain very personal things that I haven't felt comfortable exploring with other girls. I've dipped my toes into findom, and told her I wanted to explore this more.

She bombarded me with audio WhatsApp messages affirming that she was into these things in all kinds of sexy ways.

Most session girls are only about the wrestling - she made it clear she was far beyond that.

In hindsight this is often a sign that they are not very good at wrestling. I wouldn't say she's bad at it but she's average at best yet charges rates higher than the standard $300 an hour.

She has taken full advantage of my interest in findom, but she hasn't gotten to know me, and bully and humiliate me in any real way. Big surprise, I know.

I did a 2nd session because I thought with better communication I could get what I wanted.

Indeed, it was A LOT better. But it was also a case of throwing good money after bad. As has already been stated, it goes beyond the wrestling. Sometimes you just don't click well with someone, and that is the case here (@[Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register] really nailed it in his last post).

[uxiel]

I would like to point that $300 is not standard anymore. When I started sessioning, the standard was $350, now I would say it is $400. The $350 girls have moved to $400, and the $400 girls have moved to $500. I have only had a few sessions at $300, and they were either fairly average in terms of strength or physique, or they were completely new to the scene. This is in the US, Europe is cheaper.

I would also imagine that if you're into findom, disorganized girls who are in really bad financial spots (as you described her) would have trouble faking it. Especially if she's going to vent about whatever shitty client she just had when you ask her how she is. Even if you're not into findom, that can really ruin the mood for any kind of session.

[tomjui]

Originally Posted by FetishWebDev [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]

I've dipped my toes into findom, and told her I wanted to explore this more.

So she got you to spend $3000, you're into findom and now you're complaining to us about how she got you by the balls by getting you to spend money.
Sure feels like you're making us part of your experience here.

Maybe you should instruct her to instruct you to hire an appartment for your next meeting.