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  #1  
Old 17-Apr-24, 15:49
richmiller91 richmiller91 is offline
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Default Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I am referring to the feelings behind submission to a woman. When we let a woman torture or humiliate us, we are trusting a woman to an extreme level. It's a level of trust that some don't even give to their wives or girlfriends and, it seems that the dominas/wrestler/sessioners are not very aware of it.

By being dominated, you give yourself physically and psychologically to someone and, you become vulnerable. I am trying to say that there is something beyond money and sexual arousal, and that is the trust we give to the wrestlers who beat and humiliate us.

Do you think the dominas/wrestlers understand that?
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Old 17-Apr-24, 16:06
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I think most dominas or wrestling girls understand their responsibility in a technical way so they won’t choke the man to death for example even they maybe could do.
If they are interested in feelings I don’t know, it is well more a business I think.
I think it can be more about deeper understanding with a dominant girlfriend.
My girlfriend is pretty aware of the meaning when I can’t make her release me anymore.
A wrestler, domina or escort will normally let go when the paid time is over. At the mercy of a girlfriend it can be more „open end“ . For me it is an even deeper matter of trust and giving myself to the situation.
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Old 17-Apr-24, 20:39
offbyone offbyone is offline
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

Yeah. With a professional session wrestler, yes, I am trusting her to do things safely - but once you take away the erotic and intimate aspects, is that so different to trusting my mechanic to make my car safe to drive, or my electrician to make my cooker not kill me?
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Old 18-Apr-24, 07:57
yotv yotv is offline
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I think women with some experience with submissive men will know what to do with them quickly. but the average woman probably doesn't and looks down on us. ironically having less respect for us than women who like dominating men in brutal ways
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Old 20-Apr-24, 05:58
Dspruce Dspruce is offline
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

Quote:
Originally Posted by richmiller91 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
I am referring to the feelings behind submission to a woman. When we let a woman torture or humiliate us, we are trusting a woman to an extreme level. It's a level of trust that some don't even give to their wives or girlfriends and, it seems that the dominas/wrestler/sessioners are not very aware of it.

By being dominated, you give yourself physically and psychologically to someone and, you become vulnerable. I am trying to say that there is something beyond money and sexual arousal, and that is the trust we give to the wrestlers who beat and humiliate us.

Do you think the dominas/wrestlers understand that?
Obviously some of them do.
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Old 23-Apr-24, 14:31
myass696969 myass696969 is offline
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I wouldn't be so optimistic. Once you weed out those who are there just for money and those who just are just sadistic by nature, there aren't probably much left.
But there has to be some who get that, and that's why we continue our seek ^^
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Old 24-Apr-24, 03:39
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I'm just going to throw this out there, but I think, understanding the other person's feelings might be a step too far.

Guy says to girl . . . I want to fuck you hard.

Girl says to guy "I want you to do that to me" Nobody has to say "I understand exactly how you feel", because "I want that too" is all that's needed. That's what leads to sex. "I want you" "I want you too" and . . . babies.

OK, intro aside, the psychology of being understood, of, wanting to be understood - I get that. Most people get that. There's something kind of magical about having that close friend who you understand and who understands you and if you have that with a lady, maybe she's the one to marry, but it doesn't happen with most of us, with a lot of people. It's also a hard thing to really know.

"Do you know how I feel?
"I think so
"Do you really?

It's a difficult ask, and especially difficult with a session person who might only meet you a few hours a year. It's a very high bar.

But what about seeing a therapist? Is it a therapist's job to understand how their patient feels? I would say, yes, it probably is. THere's the same problem of "how well do they understand, how well can another person understand, and how much does it matter, understanding vs simply listening or having some sympathy even though they don't understand and/or, offering an outsider's opinion or guidance. This is a complicated question, and it's a matter of degrees. I don't think anyone ever 100% understands another person, so it's always going to be on a scale. Not complete.

So, why do I bring up therapists, well, because more than one person who I respect, has made the point that being a dominatrix is a lot like being a therapist. Therapists might disagree, but there are parallels. the "this is a safe space" is something both strive for and I've known more than one session wrestler who's told me that after a session, guys will sometimes confess their entire life to the ladies, or they would, if she'd give them the time. There are similarities.

But, how well do session wrestlers or dominatrixes actually try to understand their clients? Most will want to get a bunch of guidelines, such as, how hard do you want it? Do you want to use safe words? Do you want to be punched or have your balls busted, or spanked, or just scissors? Do you want to be face-sat? Most session wrestlers worth anything will want to understand what their client wants and at least to some degree, understand what they feel, or try to read if they are enjoying it or not. But how well a lady understand likely varies by a lot.

Most women will use past experience as a guide. Alyssa from C&B video wrote about this in her "how to get your wife or GF to wrestle" pamphlet. She started out mostly wrestling her husband Bob, and Bob liked to be tortured. He wanted her to ignore his taps, but she found out, after making some mistakes, that not all guys wanted that. Some guys get very angry when their taps are ignored.

And, though I never met her, I think Alyssa is great. She made fun videos, she seemed cool. C&B seemed like a good company and she even wrote a mini-book about how to approach women on how to get them to wrestle, so she had some sympathy and she even wrote in her little book "Most guys who want to wrestle women, like and respect strong women. Most of these guys respect you and trust you when they want you to squeeze them" - not her exact words, but that was the gist of it.

I don't think Alyssa ever "understood" how guys feel, but I think she respect it, and I think that's enough. For me, it's even enough if the lady is amused by it, or game to try it. At my age, I've given up trying to get people to understand me. Some will, most won't, and that's fine. What interests me, is the "You want that? I want that too" - that I said in the first paragraph. Not that I don't want to be understood, but that's a bit much for me to expect for someone who I'm spending $400 for 1 hour of their time.

Lets take an example. Here's Rhea Ripley, who's not 100% my type. She's a tad masculine for me, but she's still an 8 out of 10, maybe pushing an 8.5. She's hot. Not my top WWE lady, but would I session with her? SUre, if I could.

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I love it when ladies read "thurst" tweets and I wish more would do it.

Guy tweets to her "It'd be nice if she'd leave her boot imprint on my face"

Rhea - laughs. She says she "recognizes the twitter handle" - so she's read things that guy (I assume it's a guy) has written before. She smiles. It's cute. I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to get in the ring with guys like that, but she's amused by it, and I think that's a start.

I don't want bootprints on my face. It's a bit much for me, but I like that it's something we can talk and joke about and women who can talk and joke about things like that, or even, maybe consider doing it are OK in my book (for me, very gentle boot prints please). It's enough that they're willing to play the game.

Maybe 1 in 10 or 20 will try to understand, but I lean towards thinking that it's not essential that they understand for the session to work. It's enough that they're willing to engage and play the game and try to give the guy what he wants.

Hope that wasn't too long. Feel free to disagree and or discuss.
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Old 24-Apr-24, 04:08
TheSqueezedOne TheSqueezedOne is offline
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I believe "in general" most women do not "fully understand" the feelings behind a mans submission to them. Unfortunately I think most assimilate it in a sexual way, when indeed it really is SO much more than JUST that. If all you wanted was sex, why would we bother with the submission part? That said, dont expect to just run across women who would understand it, or even expect a signifigant other to truly understand it no matter how open and honest you are about it. There are of course women "in the lifestyle"who understand it at a much deeper level. There are submissive females in the lifestyle who can identify with your feelings because they have similar-though maybe somewhat different feelings, but they get where youre coming from. There are also naturally dominant women who fully understand the exchange of power. This is a very subjective topic that can run VERY deep depending on who is having the discussion!
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Old 24-Apr-24, 06:33
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

I think empathy and curiosity can be a key to deeper understanding.

The best experiences I had with women who asked like:

„WHY do you want to be held inescapable by a woman?…What will you feel from this?…“

before we even started.

This way I got asked years ago by a Thai massage lady who was open for holding me.

Same with my philippine girlfriend when we chatted online before we met in person.

She even asked: „why As THE MAN do you want to be helpless to a woman?“
And this kind of communication went on when we met and tried the holds.
She even began to workout more that she can trap me even better and knows how to tease me verbally when I can’t get free and to be merciless when I beg her.

I think women are different no matter if session wrestling, dominant escort or even relationship. A lot of people just want to see money/their own short term advantage doing certain things. No (deeper) understanding.
But there are also those who like also giving to give and not only to get.
More interesting than any theoretical super model with the best power and fighting skills but totally impersonal.

But this is just my opinion.
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Old 24-Apr-24, 10:31
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Default Re: Do women understand men's feelings? (Domination Relationship)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Johnnax [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
I think empathy and curiosity can be a key to deeper understanding.

The best experiences I had with women who asked like:

„WHY do you want to be held inescapable by a woman?…What will you feel from this?…“

before we even started.

This way I got asked years ago by a Thai massage lady who was open for holding me.

Same with my philippine girlfriend when we chatted online before we met in person.

She even asked: „why As THE MAN do you want to be helpless to a woman?“
And this kind of communication went on when we met and tried the holds.
She even began to workout more that she can trap me even better and knows how to tease me verbally when I can’t get free and to be merciless when I beg her.

I think women are different no matter if session wrestling, dominant escort or even relationship. A lot of people just want to see money/their own short term advantage doing certain things. No (deeper) understanding.
But there are also those who like also giving to give and not only to get.
More interesting than any theoretical super model with the best power and fighting skills but totally impersonal.

But this is just my opinion.

I think you make a good point, an a woman unfamiliar with the fetish,, or a woman who has more time, might as questions like "what would you feel from that".

I've never been asked that by a session wrestler. I've often been asked "what do I like", but there's rarely time in a session to discuss any deeper than that, and I think that's fine. I think most session women try to have a kind of superficial understanding, but the questions, at least for me, rarely go any deeper than "what do I like or what do I want".

You mentioned a massage therapist, which is also pay by the hour, but in that case, she probably wanted to know, as she'd never done it before.

A girlfriend is different. A girlfriend asking those questions makes sense, though for me, I never had that or anything similar asked of me by a GF.

I've had 3 girlfriends that tried fetish. Two didn't care for taking on a dom role. They did it, but they never liked it, and never asked me many questions about it. The 3rd. The best one, liked using her strength against me so "why I liked it", never came up. She was just happy to do it because she liked being physical and in control.

Interestingly, that GF was one of only 3 ladies who got me to tap in a body scissor. Very hard to do and most session women haven't been able to get me to tap in that hold, but she was able to and more than once.
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