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View Poll Results: What will be the outcome of this session?
InTheFlesh86 will win Part 1, but lose Part 2. 3 5.66%
InTheFlesh86 will win Part 2, but lose Part 1. 3 5.66%
InTheFlesh86 will win both Part 1 and Part 2 (most likely). 10 18.87%
InTheFlesh86 will lose both Part 1 and Part 2 (<1% chance). 10 18.87%
I want Dez to make InTheFlesh86 cry. 27 50.94%
Voters: 53. You may not vote on this poll

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  #1  
Old 04-Jul-20, 03:09
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InTheFlesh86 InTheFlesh86 is offline
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Default Dez Desire vs Me

All my life I have stood idly by and watched many of my fellow men tossed to and fro, choked, pinned and humiliated by beautiful women and wondered, “Yeah, but what if she went up against ME? Certainly there has to be a limit as to what degree of size and strength can be overcome by grappling skill, right?” For years I speculated, built up my body, and wondered what I would do if I ever came face to face with a strong and skilled woman. Would I react like [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register], or would it be more like [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]?

Well now, at age 33, I can finally say that the wait is over--the stars have aligned, and the time has come for me to have my first, and quite possibly my only, real-life session. I have made contact with a powerful woman known as Dez Desire (who seems great by the way) and the two of us will square off August 22nd, on Dez’s home turf in Las Vegas, Nevada, USA.



Here‘s the agenda we’ve planned --

Part 1 - Submission Challenge (~30 min) -- To start things off, Dez will put me in a variety of holds, and I will show her how easy it is for a real man to muscle out of them! To raise the stakes, I have given Dez the creative license to force me to make embarrassing admissions to her before she’ll let me go, in the unlikely event I’m unable to escape. Things like: “I admit that women can be just as strong as men”, “I admit that right now a woman could end my life”, “I admit that a woman’s skill beats a man’s strength”, “I apologize to women for my male ego” etc. I will be trying as hard as I can to leverage my gym-bro 6’4’’ 255lbs body to get out of these holds (barring any unsafe or inappropriate behavior of course).

Part 2 - Grappling Experiment (~15 min) -- After that, Dez and I will face off in the ultimate display of manly size and strength against womanly skill and experience! This will be less of a formal 'match' and more of an 'experiment' in that I won’t be trying to submit Dez, rather I’ll try to avoid being submitted by her while remaining in control throughout.

Part 3 - Lesson (~15 min) -- Finally, Dez has graciously agreed to spend the time we have left teaching my wife some holds that she can use on me! I told my wife she can write up a list of all the things I do that annoy her and all the things she wants from me, and if she can get me in a hold that I can’t get out of, I will agree to one item from her list before she lets me go.

Over the next several weeks I’ll be posting status updates and any new developments to this thread. I will also be eating and lifting much more consistently to try to get back to something approaching what I used to be.


Place your bets now! How is this going to go down?




Last edited by InTheFlesh86; 31-Jul-20 at 19:01.
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  #2  
Old 04-Jul-20, 06:54
RNC RNC is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

Given the agenda, I think you'll do badly. I think Dez will do well.

Part 1 - Submission Challenge
If Dez can't submit you when you let her put you in holds, that is proof that jiu-jitsu (or whatever martial arts she uses) doesn't work. And I'm pretty sure that martial arts do work. I think you'll be tapping and saying whatever she wants you to say.

Risk: The main risk (in terms of your enjoyment) that I would see in part 1 is you being too prescriptive in what Dez is to say to you when she has you at her mercy.

A bit of a tangent... but I remember one time I asked a wrestler in the pre-session emails to insult me about my skinny arms during the session. I thought going into the session that I'd be humiliated by that, as I genuinely am self-conscious about my skinny arms in real-life. But when she said it, my only thought was "you pay attention to pre-session emails". There was no humiliation. She did it great as well. She was feeling my bicep as we wrestled and laughing about its size. Unfortunately, as good as she pulled it off, it did nothing for me humiliation-wise as I had specifically asked for it.

I know that Dez making you say things is a bit different than asking a session wrestler to say humiliating things - but I much prefer the "make me say stuff" instruction than the "make me say X specifically" instruction. I remember Venom saying "compliment me" when she had me in her triangle and then when I said something (embarrassingly bland) like "you're beautiful", she'd say "you have to do better than that - make it original" and kept me in her triangle. It was scary trying to come up with something original on the spot. Hopefully Dez can put you under pressure like that.

Part 2 - Grappling Experiment
This is essentially the ruleset for most of my sessions - except that I don't tell the girl that I am only going to defend. If she wins, I want her to think that she won when I was trying to win as well. I do my best to defend but if there are openings (e.g. for me to apply a choke), I don't take them.

You'll have a better chance here than in part 1 (you've no chance in part 1) but I think you'll find it difficult. I think only defending is more difficult than attacking and defending.

Part 3 - Lesson
This will be interesting but I think your wife will find it tough to pick much up in 15 minutes. Learning from scratch is tough. You might be better off focusing on one hold. I'd suggest a triangle as, once you are in that, it's pretty much game over.

You'll have a great time for sure anyway.
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  #3  
Old 04-Jul-20, 07:26
ssddfaudhey ssddfaudhey is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

All I'm gonna say is check you ego at the door lol Your size won't matter when you're in a triangle choke or RNC lol
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Old 04-Jul-20, 08:24
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InTheFlesh86 InTheFlesh86 is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by RNC [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
Risk: The main risk (in terms of your enjoyment) that I would see in part 1 is you being too prescriptive in what Dez is to say to you when she has you at her mercy.
I think this is actually really good advice and I think I'm going to take you up on that. As I've mentally rehearsed various scenarios, I think I've become more 'comfortable' with the idea that I might not be able to escape some holds, and I think that's largely because I've stuck to the same script. So with that in mind, maybe making things less predictable would be more effective (and terrifying).

In my email to Dez, I did tell her to "feel free to be creative", so hopefully she'll take that to heart.
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Old 04-Jul-20, 08:30
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InTheFlesh86 InTheFlesh86 is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

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Originally Posted by ssddfaudhey [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
All I'm gonna say is check you ego at the door lol Your size won't matter when you're in a triangle choke or RNC lol
RNC is going to be hard, but I'm convinced I can get out of a triangle, especially from a girl.
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Old 04-Jul-20, 10:19
RNC RNC is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

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Originally Posted by InTheFlesh86 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
RNC is going to be hard, but I'm convinced I can get out of a triangle, especially from a girl.
I would think that triangles are seen as more secure and more difficult to escape than RNCs. It might just be because legs are stronger than arms. But I also think that more can go wrong in a RNC technique-wise, e.g. in a RNC you can pry at her arms if they aren't correctly locked up, you can rotate your body, etc. I find it more difficult to wriggle my way out of a triangle - but maybe that's just me!
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Old 04-Jul-20, 11:27
ssddfaudhey ssddfaudhey is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

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Originally Posted by InTheFlesh86 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
RNC is going to be hard, but I'm convinced I can get out of a triangle, especially from a girl.
Lmao ok let us know how that goes.Ive been in triangles from 100lb girl that I had to tap in seconds.Its not about streangth,once its locked you tap or you nap.
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Old 04-Jul-20, 17:01
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InTheFlesh86 InTheFlesh86 is offline
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by ssddfaudhey [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
Its not about streangth
Oh I'm pretty sure strength will help

This will be me after I get out of it...


Last edited by InTheFlesh86; 04-Jul-20 at 17:24.
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Old 04-Jul-20, 18:20
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by InTheFlesh86 [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
After that, Dez and I will face off in the ultimate display of manly size and strength against womanly skill and experience! This will be less of a formal 'match' and more of an 'experiment' in that I won’t be trying to submit Dez, rather I’ll try to avoid being submitted by her while remaining in control throughout.
Why this tough?
It doesn't make much sense to me, why would you not try to submit her?

It would probably give a very misleading and unrealistic result, you have to consider that it's much, much easier to avoid being submitted when you are just focused on defending than trying to attack.

Most BJJ techniques are designed specifically to exploit the openings than someone make when attacking and turning them in your favor (eg. you try to choke them you give them an armbar, you try to headlock them you give them your back, you try to punch them you give them an easy sweep or a triangle, you try to kick them you give them a leglock etc....I know you won't be punching and kicking each other in a grappling session but it's just to further illustrate the point).

For a textbook example you can see the difference between Royce Gracie and the much bigger and stronger Ken Shamrock's two matches in the first ufc events (in the first match Shamrock got on top of him, tried to submit him and as a result he was countered and submitted in less than a minute, in the second one he again went on top of him, he just laid there passively without trying to attack and they went to a 35 minute draw).

I myself have defeated much bigger guys that I would have not be able to submit if they were not trying to win and just to survive until a time limit.

I think it would be much better to just have a regular submission grappling match.
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Old 04-Jul-20, 18:46
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Default Re: Dez Desire vs Me

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elbow Escape [Only Registered Users Can See LinksClick Here To Register]
Why this tough?
It doesn't make much sense to me, why would you not try to submit her?

It would probably give a very misleading and unrealistic result, you have to consider that it's much, much easier to avoid being submitted when you are just focused on defending than trying to attack.

Most BJJ techniques are designed specifically to exploit the openings than someone make when attacking and turning them in your favor (eg. you try to choke them you give them an armbar, you try to headlock them you give them your back, you try to punch them you give them an easy sweep or a triangle, you try to kick them you give them a leglock etc....I know you won't be punching and kicking each other in a grappling session but it's just to further illustrate the point).

For a textbook example you can see the difference between Royce Gracie and the much bigger and stronger Ken Shamrock's two matches in the first ufc events (in the first match Shamrock got on top of him, tried to submit him and as a result he was countered and submitted in less than a minute, in the second one he again went on top of him, he just laid there passively without trying to attack and they went to a 35 minute draw).

I myself have defeated much bigger guys that I would have not be able to submit if they were not trying to win and just to survive until a time limit.

I think it would be much better to just have a regular submission grappling match.
Thanks, I was hoping someone would ask me about that!

It's just not that interesting to me to be honest. I don't know jujitsu or any martial art, so naturally I'm not familiar with those techniques for inflicting damage upon my opponent. If I were going to try to hurt someone in a fight, I would likely resort to the same kinds of basic human tactics that most untrained people would--Punching, kicking, stomping, choking, biting, gouging, pulling hair, low blows etc. Those are the offensive techniques I have at my disposal, and they're all ruled out by the rules of BJJ/Judo etc. So by engaging in a BJJ contest with someone trained in BJJ, I don't have any greater chance of winning than someone who doesn't know how to hold a tennis racket has against someone who plays tennis. As a sport, I simply don't know the rules of the game, so rather than flounder around and aimlessly flail my arms in my opponent's face and wait to get caught in an arm-bar or a triangle, I'd rather just focus on defending/controlling. Depending on how difficult that is, I might be able to make an educated guess as to how a "real fight" would go.

In short, I think these popular videos of big guys losing to small guys in BJJ are very misleading and actually not that interesting. That is not to say that in a real fight the outcome would always be different, but sometimes it would. And the funny thing is, this isn't unique to BJJ! Take any bigger, stronger, more athletic person and put him up against a small girl in anything that she's skilled in and that he's never done and she'll have a good chance of winning. Duh!
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